"...If you're a PRO" Coloured Print

Prints, prints, prints!

Prints of the above illuminated manuscript will be available at the Movies and Makers arts and crafts show.

This phrase seems kind of silly out of context. It's fairly silly in context, actually. But it's a pretty satisfying ideal. Look, if you're going to be serious about something fucking buckle down and sharpen your steel. Have some finesse, though. Don't be a clutz. Stay graceful. No one likes a butterfingers. Firm grip. Be decisive.

Maybe I'm reading too much into it.

MOVIES & MAKERS!

I am very proud to announce that I will peddling my wares at the Fox Theatre in Toronto on Nov. 21st in the first ever Movies & Makers arts and crafts show.

Here's the blog with all the details: http://www.movies-and-makers.blogspot.com/

The big finale of the day is a screening of "Handmade Nation", a documentary chronicling the rise of the DIY, arts and crafts movement across America. I saw it when it made its Canadian debut and it is not to be missed. It features among many other DIY luminaries, The Little Friends of Printmaking.

I'll have originals, prints, switch plates, bookmarks and one of a kind buttons.

So please, come by and pick up something with a sexy lady on it and stay for a fantastic film that will leave you with fingers itching to create!

The Visitor and The Ranter

So first up is a commission for my friend, PJ. It's a depiction of his dream which he described to me so long ago he had forgotten it. I embellished it a bit. In the dream he said that he had a tinfoil hat and people started bringing him things. All PJ requested was that a wolf be involved. So I made his tinfoil hat extra extravagant and had him intercepted by a gift-giving messenger from some wolf-riding amazon race.

For the people out there who have dreams they would like interpreted please contact me about doing a commission. Much of my work is inspired by dream-like worlds. Worlds where pants aren't always necessary and there's nothing but trouble to get into.


Next is a clip from the field recordings I make while en route to work or home or wherever. Candid crazies, arguments, or any sound I happen upon that gives me pause.

This particular clip is from a very lucid ranter I heard on the street car. He seemed to be addressing not only those on the street car but the city of Toronto as a whole.

TORTURED---


I've provided a transcript of the rantings below so you can follow along? Just in case his genius was not immediately evident.

"...somehow are awarded some of my qualities unto yourselves? I don't think so. I think you're vile. All my qualities tell me you're vile. I tell you I'm being tortured and your like, 'that's what I said. You know?' There's a frickin' difference actually. I have a ludicrous pain tolerance, you might not, eh?"

"No, no, you're not allowed to make fun of me, eh? You're only allowed to send me those fake concerned looks that are more insulting and scarier than anything imaginable. 'Look at me! I can fabricate a fake concerned look. I'm like a George Bush.' Eh?"

"I've been studying reasoning my entire life, Toronto. My entire life. And your arguments as a population are moronic at best. And it would require torture for you to nod 'yes' to those moronic arguments. Are you being tortured, Toronto? Are you just sick and pathetic? Uh? You're just greedy little bastards. I kind of fantasize about being tortured instead of being greedy little nothings."

And then he got off. Wow.

The Queen's Accusation REVISED!

So this is an older piece posted before that has been revamped. When a friend came over and thought the queen was a fly I knew she needed to be updated. It's one of those weird mindset's you get in where something seems like it should be obvious but is clearly just a projection. So here she is, with an addition that, I hope, makes her more bee-like.

She's also on sale HERE at the Cyclops and Owl etsy store.

What a rental.

Alright. I'm not one to be loyal to brands but I love Budget when it comes to renting a car. I love Budget because I hate Discount.

When I arrive to claim my reservation at Discount they say they do not have the car I have reserved but they can offer me a Mini Cooper or a BMW, both of which can not be insured through Discount's insurance policies. They say I will have to call my credit card provider and arrange my own insurance which will, no doubt, be more expensive than the Intermediate car.....which I RESERVED. They say they MIGHT have some cars coming in later, maybe --- they never know. Yes, that's what they said. So I took the subway to the place I had initially planned on driving to. Then 4 hours later they call saying they finally have a car for me. The above was drawn on the subway on my way back across town to pick up my quaint little Chevy Cobalt with nostalgic manual locks (they still make those?) The drawing made me feel much better.

I apologize for the rant but if one person steers clear of Discount then it was worth it!

As a comparison, every time I have reserved an Intermediate car from Budget in the past year they also didn't have that particular car ready for me when I arrived. But THEY gave me something like a Dodge Charger for the price of the Intermediate car every time. The End.

Got their hair did #6

#6 in the series of 8. The ol' Swoopty-Floop.

#5
#4
#3
#2
#1

Got their hair did #5

#5 in the series of 8. B-b-b-b-bangs!

#4
#3
#2
#1

Got their hair did #4

#4 in the series of 8. No Bump-Its here. Bouff-Its, maybe.

#3
#2
#1

Also, this is apparently my 100th post! To celebrate I will try to get to sleep before 3 tonight. I'm not promising anything.

Got their hair did #3

#3 in the series of 8. Pop them collars, you clever minx!

#3
#2
#1

Got their hair did #2

#2 in the series of 8. There must have been some serious hairspray tycoons in the 60s. Good-bye Ozone!

Full story here

Got their hair did #1

Over the years I've accumulated a lot of unique surfaces that I have left unfinished or unbegun. It ends now. From an old Operation game board to a raw matryoshka nesting doll, (both now in progress, thank heavens) they start to haunt you. Once they were fiercely inspiring but left to grow dusty on the shelf they become ugly goblins, mocking you as you stroll by.

What the piece above (about 2.5'' square) was painted on is definitely from the crypt. This series is painted on half the stained glass pieces from a salvaged hanging lampshade. It was grabbed one night on a walk--- from what was technically garbage (garbage picker!). I brought it home and quickly dismantled it with some tin-snips. The pieces have been in a drawer long enough to be moved to a new apartment and I moved almost 2 years ago, so, SHIT!

60's Hairdos!

There are 8 in all. They will be sold separately in the Cyclops and Owl etsy store once the hangers are applied.

The Cyclops and Owl Gentlemen's Club: Vonnegut

Did I say daily posts? Such is life. Quit living in the past.

Now. Here is the first of a series. The Cyclops and Owl Gentlemen's Club. Inductees drawn in sultry red with my parallel pen.

The first is a posthumously inducted juggernaut of the written word, Kurt Vonnegut Jr. I fell in love with Vonnegut rather late in life. In highschool my only exposure to his genius was the short story "Harrison Bergeron" which I loved but was merely a inkling of the love affair that was to come over a decade later. I wish I had his novels to escape into back then. Instead I've gorged myself on his novels over the past 3 years and I'm still insatiable. There's just no one quite like him. So it goes.

All of the inductees will be made available through my etsy store eventually so stay tuned!

Twila's Practice

Well this is what it's all about, right? Honing your skills, and loving every second of it. I don't want to count my chickens before they've hatched but I expect to see some more sword toting so-and-sos in the coming month because, why the hell not?

Sheepish Submarine

Alright so I love alliteration. Sorry. Get used to it.

This is another revival. It was originally sketched as a thumbnail for a piece I never completed back in the Procrastitaceous Period. Years later when I had been laid off I was trying to diversify the ol' portfol' so I came up with some faux companies to do draw things for. I repurposed the fluffy fellow above to be the logo for Sheepish Submarine Hydrotherapy. I imagine this company provided sense deprivation chambers and other forms of aqua themed treatments to you deal with any anxiety or phobias. The rehabilitation process, of course, began by being lured in by the sheep's serene expression.

Boggle Sketch Dinosaur

This ugly brute was sketched between rounds of boggle one evening. I think I was going for a "dinosaur with jowls". I'm unimpressed. Incidentally, the first real job I remember REALLY wanting was to be a paleontologist.

Periscope Tug Champion

This is a forgotten sketch I did about 3 years ago. At the time I was good at drawing the chassis of a lady but unsatisfied with the faces I was drawing so I would often save myself the risk of butchering a face by throwing on a fancy helmet. I've thankfully overcome this obstacle, to some extent at least, but I still love drawing girls with crazy masks and such.
There was also the fact that I was often running into issues at work where the people I was drawing were perceived as unattractive and not fresh-faced enough for the client. I had just heard we were going to be working for a corporate lingerie giant. Out of my initial brainstorm sketches came the drawing above and Kendo Chat Noire.

...If you're a PRO

I drew this character while on the flight down to California. The text is a direct quote from a conversation Amy and I had with her Dad. He was showing us a knife that Amy's little brother found in the bushes around their house (scary!). He was also showing us his flicking and unflicking skills with said knife. Anyway, I thought it was one of the coolest sentences I'd ever heard.

Ahoy, Past Self!

So I'm overdue (again) for a post. Well, I just got back from a vacation in California spending time with Amarina's family, so that counts for a bit of my tardiness. It also gave me a chance to see a rather important drawing I did over 3 years ago. The swashbumbling fellow above was drawn for Amy's little brother, James. He was having a pirate birthday party. I couldn't attend but I sent this along. It's an important drawing for me because it ushered in a return to drawing. At the time I wasn't in the habit of drawing at all which was really troubling. And the less I did the more I built up apprehension over starting again. This was probably the first thing I had drawn in months which, thankfully, has become something that is completely unacceptable.

I can't quite remember what I had named this character but the story was that he was the sole survivor of the crew and was going completely bonkers floating around in the crow's nest.

UPDATE: * Lonely Fish-Faced Gerrard *

The captain who went down with the ship and came up with the crow's nest. (Thanks, Shona!)

Next week I'm starting daily posts because even though I'm drawing more now than 3 years ago I'm still not drawing enough. There. I've told the universe. I HAVE to do it now.

Portrait of a Pair of Parrots

A quick apology for the unacceptable distance between this and the previous post. Obscene. I feel awful about it. I'm currently gathering the gumption to start doing daily drawing posts for my sake as well as yours. Stay tuned.

This work is a bit of a departure for me. No sexy ladies or sci-fi wonders, just two lovely birds. Meet Dexter and Penny, two green-cheeked conures. Dexter, the flatheaded male, passed away recently and I thought my friends deserved a portrait of the two together. Penny is definitely the softy of the pair, Dexter, a spirited curmudgeon beyond his years. I hope this portrait captures an inkling of the strange bond between these mates.

Dingo Ground-Sloth

An older drawing that has no provenance other than I bought some new micron brush pens and just dove in. I didn't have a plan. Something furry was the prime directive, I guess. I really like these. They are the same ones that I later used to put the finishing touches on the "Tomorrow Never Knows" poster. I learned that the tip is virtually the same as Amarina's liquid eye-liner. Fun fact!

Greatest Misses: Soft Underbelly

Here's another installment in the ongoing switchplate series. This robot is getting a little bit grabby and unfortunately his priority processor has made a tiny error and caused him to grab the knife-less hand. It won't end well.

Available here at Cyclops and Owl

Tomorrow Never Knows

This is a poster I did for my friend Eva, a sweetheart with a ridiculously savvy eye for vintage clothing. She's sifting through dusty bins of bygone treasures, just for you! They are all here at her Etsy store:

neverknows.etsy.com

She also keeps a blog chronicling her inspirations here:

http://www.afinetoothcomb.blogspot.com

Pay attention! This lady has enough vintage wears to choke a rutting rhino. Get a silk scarf for your sinfully naked neck or a sassy Lucite clutch to stash your ivory handled derringer. You won't be disappointed.

Crow Calliope

So here is a drawing I love. A drawing that I submitted to a T-shirt design contest that shall remain nameless, though some of you know about it. I submitted it about 5 minutes past the deadline. Now that I've seen the 30 finalists AND the fact that none of them get ANY exposure whatsoever, not even their name or a single link ie: Thomas H's design (!), I'm totally pleased that I'm not a finalist. Now it's MINE and mine alone to use. Here it stands, debranded and looking better for it.

Greatest Misses: Room For Kaboom

Truth is, Crushida (CRUSH-ida) is all about finesse, despite her name. She could have knocked the bullet back at this towering douche-bag but she prefers to juke and move in for a jab to the his mechanical jugular.

Available here at Cyclops and Owl

ROMANTIS

Well, well, well. I am, to say the least, happy with this. It slides on like a nice pair of racing gloves. Balanced, like a jade handled riding crop.
It was uttered by my cohort in a random act of brilliance. At first, she laughed, but the laughter dissolved into a crystal clear confidence. ROMANTIS. Yes.

Cauldron who?